There is no way my tax situation can possibly be worse than last year. Last year I got a big ol unfriendly present from the government that I am still attempting to pay my parents back from bailing me out of. So naturally, tax time holds a negative connotation for me. And it's not just the fear of owing thousands of dollars, it's the fear that I have, once again, fucked up. Even though my accountant is the official Nicest Lady on the Planet who assures me that there's no shame in making mistakes on your taxes, that's why people pay other people to do them after all, I still beat the hell out of myself if I perceive any small way that me doing things differently could have made the situation better, even if I don't know what that something I could have done differently was. And then there is, of course, the idea that I have taken my Christmas bonus, which was to have bought me a fabulous, relaxing Caribbean vacation that I quite richly deserve, and put it in the bank for just this moment, where I will have to hand over almost half of it to this woman for her services and if I owe a substantial amount, guess where the rest of said bonus is going.
So yeah. I need me some happy thoughts.
- I am going to stop bitching about it and just get a haircut. Once you've gotten a style that works for you and found a stylist you trust and can afford, you're an idiot not to just get the haircut when you need it. I'm just not used to maintaining a hairstyle, is all.
- Maybe, if Kris sees how great my hair looks, he will get a much-needed haircut too?
- Tonight I will lay my hands on both the long overdue Counting Crows album Saturday Nights/Sunday Mornings and the long awaited first early mixes of one of the first of 3 songs on the Schocholautte single.
- If there is any money left from my bonus when all is said and done, I am going to go shoe shopping and buy a fabulous pair of shoes. Said shoes will provide the present to myself that I feel a bonus should go towards and shopping for them will allow me an experience I've mostly had to deny myself lately, in favor of paying down debt. Any further money after shoes will be used practically to help with said debts and/or pay for things I need, like car repairs and computer memory. We'll see how much the government wants first. All this makes me feel good.
- Once this accountant meeting is over, at least I will know and at least I will be done with it. I will be able to move on and be able to accomplish more rewarding grownup tasks like visiting doctors with my fancy new insurance. And I will not have to live in dread of whatever the outcome might be.
Haircut and new shoes and new music and accomplishment. That and a latte will have to be enough to get me through the rest of this day. Your additional words of support are much appreciated.